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Thread: Always thin, now overwght?

  1. #1
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    Always thin, now overwght?



    I'm just curious if others have been thru this?
    Yah know, thin and BAM,,,we got a new Butt?(not that there is anything wrong with it - Seinfeld).
    What I am interested in knowing is how this makes you feel, and have you lost the wgt to be "back to normal"
    I ask, because, I did gain alot of pounds in the last few yrs. What I found interesting was how people/friends approached me differently, ONLY due to me being 'bigger'. It's almost fat-racist. So, I know I went thru this for a reason,
    I was told, ' you look the same, just with more wgt' or, 'your bigger'. duh, I knew that.
    BUT NOW that I'm losing wght, I'm told, " you look so good"
    "Your hair looks pretty, you haven't aged a bit." "your face looks better"
    (BTW, I'm 40, so I like the urban legend - your ass or your face)
    It's urban legend....

    What I'm trying to get at is...SO we gain some pounds- and the reactions.
    I feel blessed to have been there, done that. I Know I have always been ME, any wght. But, I knew I was a chunky, and dressed differently. Love my GF who were always big, they have the most confindence in the big city.
    I just think this is interesting. IF you were ALWAYS thin, gained alot of wgt- how did people treat you differently? I know I was treated differently when I became overwght. IT is silly, but very true.
    Ciao

  2. #2
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    Not at all silly, very true. We are a looks-conscious society.

    I had always been thin - I've gained some, but not a lot of weight. (I'm probably at the upper "normal" range.) I would be more comfortable with myself being a little lighter, but it's not a big deal. I try to stay healthy, eating mostly right (not giving up my Haagen Dazs), exercising, etc.

    Perhaps many people would find this hard to believe, but I always hated the comments I got when I was thin - it seemed okay for people - even complete strangers! - to tell me that I needed to gain weight, or eat more, etc., and I never noticed people being that direct to people who are overweight. (Back then, I really wanted to gain weight, and just couldn't - don't hate me!) Actually, even though I am no longer thin, with something like 2/3 of Americans being overweight, by comparison I'm thin, and sometimes people will refer to me as "skinny" - even though my doctors have told me to watch my weight! Kinda funny.....

    None of us wants to be "inspected". I'm sorry you are getting so many comments - it's never pleasant, even when people don't think they are being rude.

    Anyway, I'm just happy to be here, doing my best. As I get older I'm better able to put things in perspective, keep my priorities straight. I lost my sister (my best friend) and other friends/relatives too early to cancer, diabetes, heart disease, kidney failure, and I'm sure all of them would be happy to have had more time - overweight or not.

    You sound pretty confident yourself!

  3. #3
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    I'm constantly being accused of being anorexic. But it get's worse, I have a co-worker that says to me all the time "I wish I could be as thin as you are". This co-worker has known me for years and she saw me lose about 35 lbs because I have cancer, yet she wants to be as thin as me. I would never say it but I want to say it "well get cancer and you can be thin like me". So, either way, big or small, you will always get comments from rude people. I try to just overlook them and go on but sometimes it is hard.

  4. #4
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    sorry, my mom is thin and she has had comments, sure but its NOTHING like being overweight. and people DO say mean things to fat people. i was with my friend at Kmart once, and we were going down the candy aisle to get some stuff because we were going to a party.

    and old man comes up to my friend who was grabbing the candy and said "you dont need to eat that. you'll end up fat like her"...pointing to me. i was in SHOCK. well, i told him he was an "effin a-hole" and that was the end of that. (i later told my parents that and mom was upset i swore like to that to an old man and my dad was PROUD!)

    and i was ENDLESSLY teased and ridiculed my ENTIRE life. my self-esteem is completely shot. i'd trade anything to just be the type of 'fat person' that the "skinny" people think they are.

    and im in my twenties and i'm just now realizing how to take better care of myself. nobody helped me along the way...and when i did get help, no plans were stuck to. i realized if i was going to do this, i'd have to do it on my own. not even my doc will help me. i still get stared at now but i let it roll off my back because i know theres a lot of ignorant people out there who think that i just sit at my table and eat all day, when in fact, i have many problems including a metabolism problem, which i've been taking meds for.

    i can understand both ends of the spectrum...constantly being commented on for being skinny and stuff. im sure its annoying. but its not as PAINFUL and hurtful as it is to be told how big you are and how you need to lose weight and basically how you're not good enough and need to conform. i wish for once in my life someone would tell me i was too thin and needed to eat.

    im not tryin to be rude here or anything...just giving my 2 cents.

  5. #5
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    Quote Originally Posted by 311heaven
    im not tryin to be rude here or anything...just giving my 2 cents.
    No offense taken, I "get" what you are saying, I didn't mean to imply that the comments I've received about being thin have the same impact as the comments others have received about being overweight. I've never understood why people - whether friends, relatives, or strangers - think it's okay to offer unsolicited advice. Some, like the man you mentioned, are just plain rude & mean, but I bet plenty others are just thoughtless. I wish people were more accepting of each other.....

  6. #6
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    Quote Originally Posted by katland View Post
    No offense taken, I "get" what you are saying, I didn't mean to imply that the comments I've received about being thin have the same impact as the comments others have received about being overweight. I've never understood why people - whether friends, relatives, or strangers - think it's okay to offer unsolicited advice. Some, like the man you mentioned, are just plain rude & mean, but I bet plenty others are just thoughtless. I wish people were more accepting of each other.....
    I agree completely. The whole thing starts right at home, really. I known of plenty of people who tell their children that if they eat something chocolately or don't get off the couch will get fat and so then the child is learning that being fat is a HUGE taboo and that they'll do anything to stay thin. And the children will ridicule others who are fat because of their own idea of what being fat means. Parents need to teach their children about acceptance of others and the idea that people are good or bad depending on their personality.

    Because of my size I've been able to kind of weed out the fake people a lot better. I know who my true friends are because they've stuck around since we were kids and have always accepted me (been best friends with one for my whole 23 years of existance). And any intimate relationships I've had, I know they've been real and the guy was into me (and my personality) and not just for my body. So those are the good points about it.

    If more people were like my best friend and boyfriend, this world would definitely be a more accepting place. I don't judge people based on their weight, and it's absolutely ridiculous to do so because its definitely whats inside that counts and those who don't know that aren't worth my time anyway. I'd rather hang out with less shallow people who have deeper concerns in life besides how much someone weighs.

  7. #7
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    Quote Originally Posted by katland View Post
    No offense taken, I "get" what you are saying, I didn't mean to imply that the comments I've received about being thin have the same impact as the comments others have received about being overweight. I've never understood why people - whether friends, relatives, or strangers - think it's okay to offer unsolicited advice. Some, like the man you mentioned, are just plain rude & mean, but I bet plenty others are just thoughtless. I wish people were more accepting of each other.....

    trust me, there's worse than accused of being anorexic. my doctor went as far as to ask me if i'm bullimic????? GROSS. if anything, i'd have think he'd asked about being anorexic, but bullimic?? maybe cuz he knows i have i migraines and nausea everyday and i have vomiting due to that. but i sure don't puke on purpose! ugh. i'm not even skinny, yet he's talking about putting me on med. to make me GAIN weight. doesn't he realize my depression will worsen if i gain weight?

  8. #8
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    for the poster.... if you've gained weight without any eating or lifestyle changes, then you may want to ask your dr. for TSH and T4 tests to have your thyroid tested. also, as people get older, often their metabolism slows down somewhat.

  9. #9
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    Quote Originally Posted by zavey View Post
    trust me, there's worse than accused of being anorexic. my doctor went as far as to ask me if i'm bullimic????? GROSS. if anything, i'd have think he'd asked about being anorexic, but bullimic?? maybe cuz he knows i have i migraines and nausea everyday and i have vomiting due to that. but i sure don't puke on purpose! ugh. i'm not even skinny, yet he's talking about putting me on med. to make me GAIN weight. doesn't he realize my depression will worsen if i gain weight?
    being accused of being anorexic doesnt bother me when its strangers, yeah its none of their business, but im used to rude ppl. what bothers me is when ppl know i just went through chemo and radiation make comments about how sickly thin i look. what do they expect someone to look like after chemo and radiation????? and then to have one of my coworkers say she wishes she could be as thin as me, that really takes the cake. the ONLY reason im so thin is because I have been fighting cancer for 3 years now. trust me, its not a fun way to lose weight. doesnt matter what you look like, some ppl will be rude no matter what.

  10. #10
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    <<None of us wants to be "inspected". I'm sorry you are getting so many comments - it's never pleasant, even when people don't think they are being rude.>>

    I found the comments interesting, so it peaked my interest to see if others have been thru or going thru this.
    I feel I now know first hand what it's like to live thin, and overweight. And there is a difference, sadly.

    <<As I get older I'm better able to put things in perspective, keep my priorities straight. I lost my sister (my best friend) and other friends/relatives too early to cancer, diabetes, heart disease, kidney failure, and I'm sure all of them would be happy to have had more time - overweight or not..>>

    My Mom passed from cancer, she was overweight all her life. Thankfully, she was. I believe her extra wght gave her extra time. She basically disappeared before she died. She battled for 6 yrs. When people noticed she lost alot of wgt, she didn't say why. Only her family knew she had cancer. I always found that sad.

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